The First Priestess: Part 7

Night Terrors

Dusk would be coming soon, and people were already coming in from the fields with baskets of crops and tired hands. Standing Deer sat on the floor and stared blankly at her family’s bed mat. She loosely held onto boldo leaves, and they were falling one by one into her lap. Last night had been so terrible, and yet Sunflower was alive again, like it had all been a nightmare. She could hear Sunflower laughing outside as she helped her dad replace the damaged branches of their hut. Red Spear hadn’t asked where the black jaguar’s body went, but she knew they would have to do something about it soon.

Sunflower ran inside. “Look, it’s me! It’s me!” she said, holding a large sunflower from the fields in her hand. The flower itself was almost bigger than her head.

“Hey, you’re right, little girl,” her mother said, her eyes refocussing, and Sunflower sat in her lap. “Did someone give that to you?”

“Yes, Dark Water did, and she gave me some seeds to give to you.” Sunflower opened her hand and tipped the black and gray seeds into her mother’s hand.

“Oh, she did? I’ll thank her the next time I see her.” Standing Deer rested her chin on Sunflower’s shoulder and stared at the bed mat again. Why have the gods chosen to focus their attention on my Sunflower? she thought. She remembered the strained faces of the carved gods on the inside of the temple, and a sudden foreboding washed over her. She hugged her daughter tightly, and Sunflower giggled and pushed the sunflower into her mother’s nose. After a minute the two stopped, and Sunflower gently brushed the flower against her mother’s cheek.

“Do you remember anything from last night?” Standing Deer asked precariously.

Sunflower held onto her flower and glided the palm of her hand over the pedals. Her memories seemed like dreams, but most of the fear was still in her mind. “I remember the Jaguar God, but he was black and had a toy in his mouth. I touched the toy, and then the Jaguar God got angry. Is what The God Whisperer said true? Was I dead?”

A lump grew in Standing Deer’s throat. “I don’t know, little girl. It might’ve all been a nightmare, but I hope it’s over now.” She hugged her daughter, and Sunflower held on tight.

Red Spear entered the hut and announced, “The wall is done!” but then he noticed his wife and daughter and sat on the floor beside them.

A few villagers came by and offered fruits to Sunflower as a favorable sign to the gods. Red Spear thanked them greatly, and as sundown came, Standing Deer lit a fire, and the family had a small pile of fruits, beans, and corn. Sunflower eyed the sweet guava fruits, but as she picked one up and held it in her hand, she unexpectedly felt a lack of appetite.

The sun was sinking beneath the tree tops, and all of a sudden Sunflower felt sick. She gripped her stomach, and Standing Deer and Red Spear moved over to her. “Oh no. Oh no,” Standing Deer repeated, touching her daughter's back and forehead.

"It’s going to happen now!" Sunflower howled. Red Spear picked her up and took her outside. She squirmed, and the moment her feet touched the ground she vomited into the lane, but her belly was small, and there wasn’t much to throw up.

“It’s okay, little girl. Once it’s all out it can’t hurt you again,” Red Spear said. Standing Deer came outside with a gourd of water, and she helped her shaking daughter drink, but then Sunflower wretched and threw up the water.

“Slowly! Slow, or just rinse out your mouth,” Standing Deer said, offering the water again. She looked at Red Spear, and both of them were disguising their panic.

Sunflower washed out her mouth and took a tiny sip of water. Nothing happened afterward, and Sunflower said, “I’m feeling better.… Don’t be worried.”

Red Spear kicked dirt over the vomit, and they returned to the hut. When Standing Deer offered food to Sunflower again she refused, and the two parents began to worry. They had just gotten their daughter back and didn’t want to lose her all over again. Should we see The God Whisperer? Red Spear thought, but he felt that they were already straining her wisdom. Perhaps, the villagers would be safer if they did not try to solve the mysteries of the gods? Suddenly his wife’s hand appeared on his, and she asked, “My husband, let’s go outside please?”

Red Spear agreed, and they walked away but kept the hut in sight as Sunflower laid on her side and watched the fire. Standing Deer held her husband’s hands and whispered, “I buried the black jaguar … beneath our bed.”

“What!? Why?” he stammered, but Standing Deer kissed him, and he shut up.

“Have you ever seen a black jaguar before? I haven’t. Not on this side of the mountain or on the other side. That jaguar is wrapped in shadows ... and you killed it. Whenever The God Whisperer speaks of the gods entering our world she says they do so in the bodies of animals. Now, I don’t believe in your gods or hers, but if you did kill a god’s avatar, then we might as well cut our throats and our daughter’s tonight instead of waiting for their punishment. But if they’re not real, to The God Whisperer and everyone else they are, and if they find out that you killed that black jaguar she’ll have us killed, so, I needed to hide its body.”

Red Spear was stunned. “Wait, you don't believe in my gods?”

“I still have my old gods, but also, why would your gods let our daughter live if you killed one of their avatars?” She had a point.

“So ... okay then. We should hide the black jaguar’s body again tonight. Or, do we not want Sunflower to see it?”

Sunflower heard her name as a whisper from her parents across the lane. She mulled in the lingering pain after throwing up and pulled her sunflower close. The fire crackled near her, and she touched the bottom of the flower where it was cut. Without the ground the sunflower will die, she thought. She wanted to plant it beside the hut, but without her parents she didn’t dare leave the hut at night again. Sunflower sighed and closed her eyes. She wasn’t sleepy, and it felt like everyone in the village was still awake too. Had I really been dead? She thought.

Sunflower rolled onto her back, and she felt a weight drop into her hand. Its sudden appearance startled her, and she sat up and found herself holding the golden panther’s toy from last night. It felt like a heavy, smooth rock. The gem on one side was pink and diamond-shaped, but on the other side were carvings of a strange but beautiful nature. Sunflower held the golden toy and traced the circular lines of the carvings. Where did it come from? she wondered. The toy reflected the firelight, and she stared at the side with the gem to see her reflection; she had never seen herself so clearly before.

The gem glowed, and she felt the toy rattle. Sunflower panicked and threw it away, but she didn’t hear it hitting anything. Then she felt the weight again, and the toy had reappeared in her other hand. She yelled and threw away the toy, but now it was in her lap. She grabbed the toy and threw it into the fire, but it never went in and reappeared in her other hand. Sunflower screamed, and dropped the toy and covered her ears.

Red Spear and Standing Deer heard the screaming and ran inside. “What’s wrong, little girl!? What happened!?” Standing Deer asked.

“There’s a toy! The black jaguar’s toy! It won’t leave me alone!" Sunflower cried, and she burst into tears and held onto her mother. Standing Deer hushed her gently and held her tight.

“What black jaguar’s toy?” Red Spear asked, looking around for something unusual in the hut.

Sunflower sniffled and looked fearfully at where she dropped the toy. “It’s gone,” she said, and dried her tears.

Red Spear ruffled his hair and sighed.

Although the coffee had gotten them through the day, the two parents had only slept for three hours last night. They decided to go to bed early and meet the morning strong, and tomorrow they would move the black jaguar’s body when the villagers would be hunting or farming, and Sunflower would be with the other children.

Standing Deer put out the fire and laid her daughter between them. Long minutes ticked by, and Sunflower waited to fall asleep. She counted her parent’s breathing, but the chirping and buzzing of the jungle seemed to keep her awake.

Seconds slowly became minutes, and Sunflower’s restless mind began to hallucinate. She was feverishly alone, while all the people she knew slept, like being the only survivor after a slaughter.

The hours dragged on, and the world remained dark and frozen. It’s terrible when a child can’t fall asleep to hide from the monsters of the night. Sunflower’s imagination spiraled as she questioned the supernatural. The panther’s toy, the sky’s gift — why am I a part of everything? What if the sun won’t come back because I can’t fall asleep? What if everything stays like this forever?

She held onto her sunflower and prayed for sleep, but four yellow pedals had fallen off by the time morning came.